Sentients?

         If I die tonight it is what it is                     Remember me 

The lord was your shepherd ...  religion lead you from love You ran from the warmth of green pastures . Convinced your affection rivaling rapids were mere still waters. You ran off , left me alone to restore my soul . Alone I contemplated what paths lead to righteousness I walked through the shadow of the valley of death with you , protected you from the evils you feared , gave  laughter and comfort . But you still left. Set a table for my enemy and anointed him as yours , and I'm still stuck here with a heart that runneth over with love for you. I have but one question ... what do I do with the memories and thoughts of you that'll haunt me for the rest of my existence ?

Can I be me without being you ? I know that sounds trippy but I can't be me without being you , Cause I'm so into you. So in tune with being with you I've forgotten what it's like to be me.

All I can think of is her , I'm not supposed to , but she has occupied all of my mind and corrupts it with thoughts of she   Thoughts of we Thoughts of us Thoughts of what it might have been like to trust   To trust your hands on my face, as they whisper their intentions with a touch To trust your smile , that made love more than a feeling To trust your head on my chest   ... Just to trust ... But I guess it was only meant to last the length of this poem

I've lived Lived in the brokenness of self in the dysfunction of being , in the trap of fit in , in the shadow of popular … and it broke me Then I was Broken for being self for meddling in being , for not being what fits, for refusing to pop popularity pills for not killing what's real … again it broke me … No , more let's not live

You again , Me again.       Within again. I've been away so long it's a sin, Unearthing the scriptures etched in your skin I pray , on your lips I prey. We speak in tongues , I let our hips sway and you let these familiar waves lead I had forgotten how cheerful your smile could be. How it illuminates the part of me that was lost at sea. The lighthouse to my boat, leading me away from the mermaids and keeping me afloat . How reminiscent of moments passed Suddenly the light is blurred again The lighthouse cannot be seen or heard again The cold violent tides of the ocean make me drift within I pretend I forgot about the light house just to be whole within