There's an elephant in the room , but no room in the Elephant . An outline with no mass , a figment of the imagination. A silhouette of anti-mass , feather light but heavy on the mind. Intangible and immaterial but present in the prefrontal cortex. Hard to ignore because it's not there.
When I look back at it all... I don't think I blame you. For walking out on me, Without a word, And then avoiding the topic, When I confronted you For walking out on me, Without a word, You made me a villain, And I guess it was true. When I look back at it all... I don't know what's worse. That you couldn't talk to me, or that it felt like it was easy for you to do what you did. Or that, I tried for months to talk to you, and maybe it was hard for you to do what you did. Leave me that is, My best and longest friend... When I look back at it all... I don't think we could recover. It's been almost a year now, Too much has passed, It's been almost a year now, I'm sure we're both different people. When I look back at it all... I don't know what I could've changed... I don't know what I did wrong, But a part of me feels like I should, I never got my closure, So this will substitute. I'm not saying you're the root of my demise, But damn...
I hate that I can't explain myself. I hate that I can't say what's going on. Or rather what happened, and the resulting actions... And my cowardice in the process, and ruining peoples lives as I go along. I hate that I still to this day, hate myself. I hate that I still to this day, hate the situation. And the choices I made, to remedy at the time, what was my environment. To place a bandage on a gun wound, and dance my way around it. And not really knowing what is the wound, or what was the gun really. And now understanding that my bandage made things worse, not only the wound is septic, this thing... it's spreading. I hate that there's no justification, I hate that there's no good reason, I hate that there's no, no good reason, I hate that, I'm drowning in mistakes. And these mistakes you guys I don't want to lie, their ruining so much potential greatness... These mistakes, are ruining so much potential happiness. I feel like I died 2 years ago... ...
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