Dark Rooms

-

It took,

dancing in a dark room...


To

realise how caged I've been.

How

closed I've been.


It took,

dancing in a dark room...


To

open my eyes and see.

To

realise what I've been failing to see.


It took,

dancing in a dark room...


To

see the shackles around my hands.

To

feel the chains above my feet.


It took,

me,

weeks,

maybe months.


To understand

that

I

peaked,

or

felt like I

was

peaking.


Had

everything in sight

and it blew away.


Had

it all in my hands

and it slipped away.


The

pain of watching

it wash away.


I

never really saw it

that way.


I

didn't want to

because then why would I try again?


Just

to

watch that shit again?


Just

to

feel that sore again?


And now things are starting to feel way too

familiar.

Like

I've been here before,

Déjà vu gone wrong.


And now things are starting to feel way too

similar.

Because

I've been here before,

where it felt like everything went wrong.


I

capsized a boat

on

still

waters.


And

I thought I knew 

how

to

swim.


I

set sail

on

different

waters.


Still

still but

I

feel like it's

tipping.


I

caged myself,

I buried myself,

still with a pulse?

What on Earth would I do that for?


Play

everything

safe?


I'm

playing everything

safe...


So

why do I feel

like it's

tipping?


It took,

dancing in a dark room...


To

feel like I need to break free...


To drown or to swim...

whatever it is...


I think I'm ready.


-Fez




Comments

  1. Voo Shining StoneFebruary 24, 2021 at 11:49 PM

    one of the most amazing things I've ever read! how do I Follow you???

    https://mewe.com/group/60023161ed3f903f21d7dc74 this is my group on mewe. you are invited to join.
    I don't have a lot of regulations....you can share your blog link there...smile

    ReplyDelete
  2. David SalinasFebruary 25, 2021 at 4:46 AM

    I had to look up your blogspot! As I read, I felt the words as if they were speaking about me and to me! This is written with depth of beauty!
    I view it, as I’ve viewed very few, like standing on the shore of the ocean and looking out at its expanse in awe, but it’s nothing, compared to diving into it and seeing the beauty that is really underneath. Where real life exists. Where beauty cannot be measured! I love this poem. It has real depth! 🌹❤️

    ReplyDelete

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